Monday, July 29, 2013

Tropical Storms and Domestic Disputes

Flossie looks pretty intimidating but they say it should slow down

It's been an interesting weekend.  Tropical storm Flossie is on it's way and  I broke up a domestic dispute on our street this morning before going to church.  I guess I can't just leave it at that....  

This isn't the story I was going to tell you but... here are the details. 

I didn't have to get physically involved, but I think my presence helped it from escalating. 

I was headed out of my house and heard someone screaming, I thought it was just kids playing, then I heard someone yell call 911 and a lot of expletives followed by get away from me.  I walked towards the street and saw a guy and a girl, late teens early twenties.  I just stood there and observed, another neighbor was hiding trying not to be seen but I was pretty confident she was on the phone with 911.  

A lot of very passionate things were said, it was pretty intense.  The guy picked up a pair of jeans up off the street (why were there jeans on the street? she must have been carrying them) and went to swing them at the girls legs, he went to do it hard in anger, then backed down before the actual blow.  He walked away, towards the path, which was the setting for the original blog post I was going to write, but I guess that will have to be another time.  I don't know where the two came from or where they were going, I haven't ever seen them before.  

I talked to the girl, after the guy left, I asked her if she was okay, she said she was.  I asked her if she wanted me to call 911, she said no she was just trying to scare him away because he wouldn't stop following her.  They obviously knew each other, and were in some sort of relationship.  In hindsight maybe I should have talked to her more?  I don't know...

I did a really poor job of being a good witness. (click here to read How To Help The Police At The Scene Of A Crime) I couldn't describe the guy at all to you.  He was local, and skinny, I think he was wearing a black shirt, short hair.  I guess that's better than nothing.  She was wearing a red dress and had long brown hair.  She walked off in the direction that he walked off in.  

The neighbor came and talked to me, and then we both realized that she walked in the direction that he did.  So we followed the path and saw her crossing the field.  And then crossing the street.  We didn't see him anywhere.  

I asked my neighbor if she gave a description of the girl to 911, she said she gave a description of the guy, but didn't of the girl.  So she  called back and gave a description of the girl and the direction she was headed and then hung up.  For some reason I found it amusing that after she had said what she needed to say she just hung up.  

The neighbor said she was on the phone with 911 for a while the first time, and kept having to repeat herself.  I think because it's Hawaii and so many languages are spoken here, they have to staff their 911 call centers with people that speak other languages. 

When we returned from the path a police officer had arrived.  My neighbor talked to the officer while I could hear over the radio the description of the girl going out.  

Jess was waiting for me at the van, we went to go grab some coffee before church, so I drove in the direction that we saw the girl go. But I didn't see her or the police officer.  I don't think it ever got resolved.  

Domestic disputes are gross.  We throw around the word "passion" a lot.  I'm not sure there is anything much more passionate than a domestic dispute.  I'm not even going to repeat some of the things I heard, but I think there was a betrayal, and some really really hurtful things were said.  And when people scream "I hate you" at the top of their lungs it makes me sick to my stomach.  

Engage:  What would you have done in this situation?  Or how have you handled a similar situation?  Let us know in the comments.  

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