Realizing that the empty pages are the future but as soon as i write them it becomes history... a 365days portrait from 2008
Here's some thoughts for a Monday...
Thoughts for a Monday written on Saturday, finished and posted on Sunday night...
I expected there to be a bit more fanfare for my 200th post on Friday. I envisioned that cheesy fire work graphic that they give you if you win at solitaire on the computer. I thought that post would have gotten more hits too. It only was viewed 44 times which is about my average. I thought it was a catchy title. I was a little bit let down. Oh expectations. I will write on expectations soon.
Although, over the past few days, I've had people tell me specifically that they read my blog and enjoy it. That's nice to hear :)
I felt strange after posting Friday's post... for a few reasons. That story actually happened MONTHS ago... so my memory of it is a bit blurry, I had the title in my drafts but I don't think I had anything written. All of my trips down there kind of blur together. I THINK I remember talking that same night to one of our students who left our school after month 4 so that means it was at least 3 months ago when that happened.
So as I was writing it... I couldn't remember if the liquor incident and the marijuana incident were the same night or not, I really think it was, but my timeline could be off, I think the liquor incident happened earlier in the night, but the way I wrote it it looked like it happened after...
And then Friday after posting it, I was trying to remember if my clothes really did smell like weed or not... I remember smelling my shirt, thinking I would, and thinking it would be a great blog post... but then I think I remember being disappointed that I didn't actually smell like weed. But I wrote it as a fact that I did... so do I go back and change it now that I'm remembering differently? I want to have integrity in what I write. Or do I just leave it as it is because it closes up the story well?
Engage: I really want to hear your thoughts. What do you guys think? Let us know in the comments.
Memory is such a funny thing... I find that even when I journal about something, the way I choose to write it will shape the memory I have of that event forever. And there's no way to write down the moment as it really was. I wonder sometimes if we have any memories at all that are actually fully true?
ReplyDeletegood points, thanks for sharing!
ReplyDeleteIn my history classes we'd talk a lot about memory, Kerry is right it's a really funny thing. The stories people tell change their memory of events and memories change on their own anyway to some degree. I think your post was good and it got me thinking even if I didn't comment, so don't let your Blogger Stats deceive you. Where and how love of Jesus intersects with "sinners" and with drink and drugs is interesting and complicated. Keep up the good ponderings.
ReplyDeletethanks megan!
ReplyDelete